Who’s in the money and who’s going bust in Poland and Ukraine...

'BOOM TIME'

BASTIAN SCHWEINSTEIGER - Don’t get us wrong, we’re big fans of the brilliant Bayern player, but does his head need swelling even more? That’s what must have happened when Germany boss Joachim Loew said Schweiny will start tomorrow’s match against Italy, no matter what. So, as we understand it, Bastian’s got a dodgy ankle, hasn’t been at his best this tournament, there’s a bench full of talent that can come in and do a fine job, but Loew still goes with him. That will do super Schweiny’s ego no harm at all...

ROY HODGSON - Had ‘Arry Redknapp been in charge In-Ger-Land would still have been outclassed by Ukraine (they were...) and Italy. That’s what the vast majority of sane fans are coming to realise. And with that epiphany has come a grudging acceptance that perhaps, in spite of the really mind-numbingly, pulling your teeth out would be more enjoyable, type fare his side dished out, Roy Hodgson is the right man to lead

In-Ger-Land. The likeable and honest chap has just got a pat on the back from the FA for his Euro effort.

'ABOUT TO DEFAULT'

SAMIR NASRI - The ridiculous Frenchman’s troubled tournament could be about to get worse four days after his side were dumped out by Spain. Snarling Samir is in danger of being banned from playing for his country for a full two years as punishment, not for playing quite badly and being as effective as fellow big head Karim Benzema, rather for his outburst at a French journalist. Upon being asked a question, Nasri told the scribe to “**** off” and then threatened to punch him. Classy. We hope the big boss men throw the book at him...

SERGEI FURSUNKO - With his KGB background and karate skills we always thought Vladimir Putin wasn’t a man to either mess with or disappoint. And we’ve been proved right as the master at remaining in power has given poor Sergei, the now-former chief executive of the Russian Football Association, a stern telling off for the country’s early exit in Poland. Fursenko apologised by resigning. Slightly harsh really when you consider the Russians went in with an old team and one that did very well just to qualify. But you don’t annoy Putin...

QUOTE OF THE DAY...

“FIFA and Britain are making a historical mistake” - UEFA boss Michel Platini still has his head in the sand over proposals for goal-line technology...

EURO SWAPSIES

Anyone living in England had better be careful when walking outside as millions of pennies finally seem to be dropping for their football team, In-Ger-Land. Yep,

it’s only taken about 20-odd years for the players to work out the plainly obvious, with Glen Johnson the latest in a long line to scratch his head and shout “EUREKA” before adding “we need to keep the ball better.” Yes Glen, you do...