'Misfits & mind games' - how the Premier League title will be decided

Bad Boy Balotelli: The walking headline is back from his three-match ban and, just like that little ‘incident’ at his gaff last year, expect fireworks.

Super Mario will probably start on the bench, but the Italian hothead, if introduced, will no doubt be either a match winner, or the ultimate sinner. We see a red card coming in this tense clash, leaving Mario to ask ‘Why always me?’ Again.

Spanish stability: At the start of the season the Spanish stopper looked as strong as his country’s shocking economy, with all the confidence of an investor about to punt on the Euro. However, since those early days it’s become more obvious why United shelled out $29 million for the keeper. That won’t stop City targeting the 21-year-old. If De Gea can prove he’s over his dodgy early displays the money will be on the visitors to get a result.

Stuck in the middle: When Fergie raided a Salford old people’s home in January it, for all Scholes’ brilliance, was a pretty frank admission the United midfield is about as solid as a chocolate teapot. City, meanwhile, have their own Incredible Hulk, or Yaya Toure as he’s sometimes known, to dominate the centre. Scholesy, 109 on his last birthday, won’t even get close enough to kick him.

Tevez on a revenge mission: The golf guru has got back into the swing of things at City, firing four goals in three games since his extended ‘holiday’. Tevez will be more keen than usual here, especially against the manager who thought he was more hassle than he was worth - imagine that? If Carlos trumps United there’s sure to be chants of ‘Fergie, Fergie, sign him up’. From sarcastic City fans.

Diving people crazy: Never fear, United. Even if Rooney has one of his bad days (think the Three Lions) or City work out that Valencia ALWAYS goes on the outside, there’s another way to get the points: Ashley Young. And no, not through some of his sporadically super wing work. But by taking a tumble in the box. Fergie’s allegedly had a word, but Ash could still make City pay the penalty.

Jonny be good: We love a good laugh at 7DAYS Towers and so are now to be found sewing our sides back together having heard Fergie call Jonny Evans the “best defender in Britain”. The Northern Irishman is good but, like the collective unit in which he plays, is too inconsistent - mixing a load of clean sheets with dire displays, such as last week’s 4-4 draw against Everton. City need to win so the Reds’ rearguard know they cannot afford any slip-ups.

Games of the mind: We’re worried for Roberto Mancini. It seems the affable Italian’s cup is always half-empty. Win three in a row, scoring 12 goals on the way, and your boss says you still haven’t a hope of winning the title. Hardly inspirational if you’re a City man. Errrrm, we think someone needs to have a word with Mystic Mancini and tell him to dump the mind games for something a bit more motivational…